This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
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At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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