And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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