I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
