i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize