i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize