I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
