i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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