I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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