we have pet lesbian snakes
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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