i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize