So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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