She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to