Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
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We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
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Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.