i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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