Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize