not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
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I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
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Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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