Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

This girl is very crazy

(586): View more from Michigan

She's one of those compassionate ppl

(586): View more from Michigan

So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her

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(586): This girl is very crazy (586): She's one of those compassionate ppl (586): So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her http://tfl.nu/xowa

Replies (2) Good night (625) Bad night (1137)
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(630): View more from Illinois

is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?

(815): View more from Illinois

that's gum

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(630): is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years? (815): that's gum http://tfl.nu/8le7

Replies (42) Good night (2829) Bad night (2710)
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(913): View more from Kansas

Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.

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(913): Her vagina was like a man-sized safe. http://tfl.nu/e508

Replies (10) Good night (443) Bad night (3326) Order T-Shirt
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(630): View more from Illinois

Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.

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(630): Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself. http://tfl.nu/vif9

Replies (55) Good night (10728) Bad night (1260) Order T-Shirt
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."

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(508): right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy." http://tfl.nu/262w

Replies (21) Good night (6520) Bad night (1403) Order T-Shirt
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(845): View more from New York

They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.

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(845): They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids. http://tfl.nu/mgv1

Replies (48) Good night (1358) Bad night (5451) Order T-Shirt
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(217): View more from Illinois

i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up

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(217): i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up http://tfl.nu/r4jy

Replies (6) Good night (2434) Bad night (654) Order T-Shirt
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(731): View more from Tennessee

I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.

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(731): I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one. http://tfl.nu/nuy4

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.

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(704): Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out. http://tfl.nu/zs8i

Replies (8) Good night (2123) Bad night (829) Order T-Shirt
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(970): View more from Colorado

just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?

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(970): just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast? http://tfl.nu/o6g0

Replies (8) Good night (1059) Bad night (2993)
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(607): View more from New York

wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager

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(607): wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager http://tfl.nu/0mj0

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.

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(203): I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday. http://tfl.nu/b5pa

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(503): View more from Oregon

So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...

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(503): So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address... http://tfl.nu/a3xh

Replies (7) Good night (1635) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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(970): View more from Colorado

Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me

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(970): Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me http://tfl.nu/8oqe

Replies (3) Good night (1353) Bad night (187)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago

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(908): i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago http://tfl.nu/q8gp

Replies (4) Good night (290) Bad night (507)

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