There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
