the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
