The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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