Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I wish I only lived at night.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize