is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
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I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
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Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize