pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
They should really pass out barf bags in church
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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