I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
