you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize