It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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