She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.