He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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