That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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