So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Don't say a word.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
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Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
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Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter