i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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