u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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