Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize