Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.