mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
