found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
