she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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