...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize