I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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