Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize