You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!