I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Don't tell me you're on acid again
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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