I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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