Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize