There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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