Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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