I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize