Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize