How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize