I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.